Debbie Downer

I have been trying to keep a happy face, but I'm just Debbie Downer right now.  I made a comment on Facebook that I probably should have kept to myself and it brought sympathy, which is not what I want.  Although it was nice to hear some kind words, I don't want to be that person that everyone is afraid to say: "How are you doing?"

"Oh God, don't ask him how he is.  He'll tell you!" 

But I guess I am doing fine for the circumstances.

I finally got the final bid for the house today.  Carlos and I have to look at it and see what we can afford.  If the bank picks up the roof, the mold and the drainage, I think we will be fine.  That is, we will be able to create a livable state for the house.  We were going to completely build out the basement.  The entire house would have beenfinished.  Grand dreams, huh?

I just got a note from my friend James about my situation.  I have never met James in person.  We became MySpace friends years ago.  We have spoken on the phone.  And like everyone else we migrated to Facebook.  James had cancer a while back.  He was complaining to me about not being attractive to anyone.  I said: "What, are you kidding?  You're the perfect cheap date.  The guy would come to your house, watch some tv with you.  Let you throw up a few times and then call it a night."  That doesn't sound so funny right now, but James seemed to like it at the time.  I do not know this man, but I care for him so much.  I feel like we would be best friends if we lived near each other.  He's a great guy.  He told me I have every right to be sad every day for as long as I like.

I told James I am thinking of contacting Extreme Home Makeover.  James said it is time for them to have a couple of Puffs on the show.  Maybe he's right.

This was the last time I went home.